Can you remember the last day when you wanted to turn round to someone at work and tell them you completely disagree with their approach? When you were frustrated with a process or a person? What did you do? Were you direct and tell someone exactly what you think, or did you do nothing? With ADHD specifically, the ability to say nothing is at times difficult and can land up getting people in trouble in the workplace if not understood.
This difficulty to not vocalise frustration or annoyance for an individual with ADHD is due to emotional dysregulation, defined simply as an inability to control an emotional reaction - whether that is a positive or negative. As Dr Edward Hallowell describes it: “People with ADHD feel everything more vividly. When it comes to passion, joy, and curiosity, this is a good thing. When it comes to rejection, overwhelm, and anger, powerful emotions can be debilitating." These reactions are not intentional, but biological. They are as a result as to how the brain works differently for someone with ADHD, and in the workplace at times this can be challenging to manage.
I have had to apologise many times for “engaging mouth before engaging brain” with people I feel safe sharing. My previous line manager went through the toughest stage with me after my ADHD diagnosis when I was working it all through. Some days I simply felt totally misunderstood - both by others but also by myself. I was very fortunate to have an understanding line manager who I trusted and allowed me the space to vent without vocalising her desire that she’s wishes I might pipe down! I was grateful for this but I also appreciate at times this was challenging for her. She had an even tougher role because she played two roles, she was my line manager but she was also my performance manager and at times I needed to be speaking to one but not the other.
One of the challenges organisations have in relation to managing those who have ADHD is how they structure the day-to-day support around people. Very often organisations expect line managers to provide day-to-day direction, career support and pastoral care, that is as I experienced, both line management and performance management duties are one person. This can create blurred lines when it comes to providing a safe space for someone who is neurodivergent to express their feelings without worrying if doing so will have a direct impact on their day-to-day responsibilities and/or their career progression.
Organisations need to think about how do they create those safe spaces to provide an outlet for those that may feel too much, whilst being able to harness the skills they bring to an organisation. The obvious approach would be to split the performance management and line management duties, providing an individual with clear boundaries over which person plays which role. By doing so providing a space where a person can go to speak more freely about how they are feeling without worrying about the impact on how they are perceived by those setting the work and providing the feedback. Ultimately less career limiting. Although I appreciate in some organisations this can be challenging due to resource available.
Another solution may be to offer a mentor or buddy to those that are Neurodivergent. I am an informal mentor to a colleague who is AuDHD. When they are struggling in the workplace, I provide that safe space for them to vent, cry, rant - whatever it is they require. During that time, I am not trying to fix. My responsibility is to simply listen and to make sure they are safe - not action.
Coaching is another avenue an organisation may consider, but if through an access to work programme or similar, sessions are often finite therefore not providing that ongoing safe space an individual may require.
Regardless of who provides this support, it highlights the need for appropriate awareness and training around neurodiversity for all of those playing a role supporting neurodivergent colleagues.
Finally, organisations need to reflect on those people they expect to play both line management and/or performance management roles. Often people are “accidental” managers - simply there because that is the expectation once an individual gets to a certain level. We must remember they are generally there on their ability to do the job not on their ability to manage. This is a much wider issue, but when allocating roles to support someone who is neurodivergent it needs to be taken into account. Patience, understanding and an ability to listen and adapt are all skills required to provide that safe space for someone who is neurodivergent to thrive in the workplace.
You may be reading this thinking “this is why I shy away from hiring those who have ADHD”. Don’t. The positives outweigh the negatives. My emotional regulation challenges do not impact my ability to do my job. In fact, if supported in the right way, organisations can harness the positives side of my emotional dysregulation - the passion, the energy, and the curiosity - as long as the safe space exists when that support is needed.
Very often I find in the Neurodiversity space, we are challenging people processes that have been in place many years - a term someone used the other day that I loved is Corporate Archaeology. In order to become truly Neuro-Inclusive, organisations need to reflect on what works because it is effective and what no longer works even though it’s always been done that way. Creating these safe spaces by ensuring roles are clearly defined and allocated is one way to a more Neuro-inclusive working world, in fact I’ll go as far to say the benefits extend to many.
